Tuesday, June 30, 2009
What a fun, sexy time for me!
Good news, dear readers! I no longer will have to give up my daytime TV reruns of Just Shoot Me and my aimless eating, because I'm not getting that job! Isn't that great? Yeah, turns out they can't afford to hire someone after all, which is tots awes, espec after they offered me the job! AAAHAHAHA GOOD ONE, GUYS! YOU GOT ME! It's so funny it makes me cry! Into my morning beer!
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Southern things
1. For Father's Day my mom and I took Robert on a garden tour in Biltmore Forest (meaning, they paid, plus paid for my hot dog lunch). Biltmore Forest is a fancy little neighborhood in/near Asheville. It's also where Andie MacDowell lives. Andie MacDowell, my arch nemesis. She has been plaguing my family with disappointment for years. It started in the year 2000 when I was sixteen and we were on vacation in a small town called Chipping Camden in the Cotswolds. Andie MacDowell happened to be filing a British movie there at the same time. I was very excited. We watched them film a few scenes and I couldn't wait until the movie came out. Well, the movie–Crush–came out like a year or so later and my mom and I saw it at the Maple Art Theater in Bloomfield Hills, because "British" means "art film." It was the worst movie I've ever seen. I would've rather watched her L'Oreal commercial on repeat for two hours. I was so mad at her.
Then, on the garden tour, we tromped through her backyard (see below) and took in her golf-course view and marveled at her waterfall pond and tree-covered terrace. My mom and I thought it was pretty nice. But as we were leaving, Robert admitted that he wasn't very impressed with her garden.
On top of that, the next day my mom was self-diagnosed with chiggers that we can only assume came from Andie MacDowell's house.
2. I may or may not have a job. I don't really know. They offered me a job and I accepted the job, but I don't know when I start the job or how much the job pays. I'm starting to think I imagined the job. I had to take two personality/behavior assessments that were like 200 questions each, so maybe the results came back as "crazy" and they've just decided to stop all contact with me. Or maybe they found that weapons charge in my background check. WHO CAN SAY.
3. Things are happening in our vegetable garden. We have beans coming up, we have jalapenos, corn, broccoli, zucchini and yellow squash, watermelon, tomatoes, and my cilantro has finally started to grow. I want to try to make my own salsas, like a little Mexican farmer.
A few days ago I got the idea that I would try to grow grapes and make my own wine. You can only imagine how well that would go. Then when Amy's dad was visiting last weekend, he noticed that we already have concord grapes growing on our fence! I've been saying for years that wine is my destiny. Turns out I was actually right.
4. Yesterday I was driving behind a truck down a major road and in the back of the truck was a girl sitting on a couch.
Then, on the garden tour, we tromped through her backyard (see below) and took in her golf-course view and marveled at her waterfall pond and tree-covered terrace. My mom and I thought it was pretty nice. But as we were leaving, Robert admitted that he wasn't very impressed with her garden.
On top of that, the next day my mom was self-diagnosed with chiggers that we can only assume came from Andie MacDowell's house.
2. I may or may not have a job. I don't really know. They offered me a job and I accepted the job, but I don't know when I start the job or how much the job pays. I'm starting to think I imagined the job. I had to take two personality/behavior assessments that were like 200 questions each, so maybe the results came back as "crazy" and they've just decided to stop all contact with me. Or maybe they found that weapons charge in my background check. WHO CAN SAY.
3. Things are happening in our vegetable garden. We have beans coming up, we have jalapenos, corn, broccoli, zucchini and yellow squash, watermelon, tomatoes, and my cilantro has finally started to grow. I want to try to make my own salsas, like a little Mexican farmer.
A few days ago I got the idea that I would try to grow grapes and make my own wine. You can only imagine how well that would go. Then when Amy's dad was visiting last weekend, he noticed that we already have concord grapes growing on our fence! I've been saying for years that wine is my destiny. Turns out I was actually right.
4. Yesterday I was driving behind a truck down a major road and in the back of the truck was a girl sitting on a couch.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Monday, June 15, 2009
Craggy Gardens
Last week on the Pinnacle Trail. The rhododendron were just starting to bloom.
The Professional Hikers (Robert is holding his bear spray).
The Professional Hikers (Robert is holding his bear spray).
Monday, June 8, 2009
Hendersonville
I'm sitting here in cut-off shorts, drinking sweet tea from a beer glass that may or may not actually be filled with beer, and I have made it! Southern style. I've already picked up an accent, learned to say "Bless your heart," and let Jesus take the wheel. So kiss my grits and get 'er done because you might be a redneck.
So far I've mostly just been trying to get settled into my new home. I'm living with Amy and Cheri in the house Amy just bought last month. It's a really cute house, not far from downtown Hendersonville, and close to a big park with tennis courts that I want to use this summer. My room has a jacuzzi tub in it, bless its heart. I can't wait to have Tub Time with all of my guests. So book your flights! Eventually I hope to never leave the tub, like Kramer–cooking meals in the tub, taking all my phone calls in the tub, sleeping in the tub.
Yesterday we started a food garden in the backyard. I'm really excited about it. We dug it out by hand and laid bricks that had been left by the previous owners along the edges and down the middle for a foot path. It's really cute. I just hope things grow. I can't wait to eat my jalapenos.
Saturday I went for my first hike as a resident. We went to Bridal Veil Falls at DuPont State Forest. It was a nice hike through the woods and at one point we had to ford a river, which I loved. The waterfall was wide and rushing, and you could climb the rocks to stand right in front of it and feel the wind from the water. Then we climbed up the rock alongside the falls and sat for a while among the tadpole-filled crater pools.
So, I'm doing pretty well here, after one or two nervous breakdowns. I do miss Chicago and my life in Evanston, but North Carolina feels good. Now I just need a job. Or at least some unemployed friends. Like retirees. Like my mom and Robert. The other day I drove to their house, which is about 50 minutes away, for lunch and to see my little Peewee. (I miss her too.) Tomorrow we're going on a hike to Craggy Gardens off the Parkway. I sort of like being retired.
The house on Glover Street.
My room from the tub–still needs some work.
The tub and Buffy. Amy and I share a connecting bathroom to the left, to the left, and if I leave my door open and sit on the toilet I can see Buffy looking at me in the bathroom mirror, and I like that.
Our little garden.
DuPont on Saturday.
Crossing the cold river.
You don't see these puppies in Chicago.
The hike back took us along power lines.
Oh, and before I left Quill forever, my coworkers gave me a Snuggie on my last day. It was the best gift ever.
I'm totally warm, and my hands are totally free, not like they would be in a cumbersome blanket.
So far I've mostly just been trying to get settled into my new home. I'm living with Amy and Cheri in the house Amy just bought last month. It's a really cute house, not far from downtown Hendersonville, and close to a big park with tennis courts that I want to use this summer. My room has a jacuzzi tub in it, bless its heart. I can't wait to have Tub Time with all of my guests. So book your flights! Eventually I hope to never leave the tub, like Kramer–cooking meals in the tub, taking all my phone calls in the tub, sleeping in the tub.
Yesterday we started a food garden in the backyard. I'm really excited about it. We dug it out by hand and laid bricks that had been left by the previous owners along the edges and down the middle for a foot path. It's really cute. I just hope things grow. I can't wait to eat my jalapenos.
Saturday I went for my first hike as a resident. We went to Bridal Veil Falls at DuPont State Forest. It was a nice hike through the woods and at one point we had to ford a river, which I loved. The waterfall was wide and rushing, and you could climb the rocks to stand right in front of it and feel the wind from the water. Then we climbed up the rock alongside the falls and sat for a while among the tadpole-filled crater pools.
So, I'm doing pretty well here, after one or two nervous breakdowns. I do miss Chicago and my life in Evanston, but North Carolina feels good. Now I just need a job. Or at least some unemployed friends. Like retirees. Like my mom and Robert. The other day I drove to their house, which is about 50 minutes away, for lunch and to see my little Peewee. (I miss her too.) Tomorrow we're going on a hike to Craggy Gardens off the Parkway. I sort of like being retired.
The house on Glover Street.
My room from the tub–still needs some work.
The tub and Buffy. Amy and I share a connecting bathroom to the left, to the left, and if I leave my door open and sit on the toilet I can see Buffy looking at me in the bathroom mirror, and I like that.
Our little garden.
DuPont on Saturday.
Crossing the cold river.
You don't see these puppies in Chicago.
The hike back took us along power lines.
Oh, and before I left Quill forever, my coworkers gave me a Snuggie on my last day. It was the best gift ever.
I'm totally warm, and my hands are totally free, not like they would be in a cumbersome blanket.
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